Caribou + Antelope = Cantelope!

I'm the mysterious anime school girl o_O

2005-09-02T00:23:28Z

This is kinda retarded but awesome XD

Take the quiz: "What kind of Anime School Girl Would You Be? (with pic.s)"

Day-Dreaming Anime School Girl
"You are the Day-Dreaming Anime School Girl. You're always lost in thought, you don't usually talk much, even so you're very popular with the guys. They always want to know what you're thinking about. You have that affect on guys, being mysterious makes all the guys curious."

So, I'm leaving for MA on Sunday morning and stuff...

Tired...

2005-08-22T05:12:09Z

So... I'm really tired... is anybody else tired?

Relationship stuff, mostly

2005-07-18T15:46:48Z

Okay, I suddenly feel like taking the time to post o_o;;;

So, life has been moving along. My relationship survived a near miss - and yet we still have not had anything that one could call an "arguement". I guess she and I just resolve our problems differently than other people... but we're still very much together, anyway. I'd like to think we're going even stronger than before, actually ^^;;; but the distance is definitely taking a toll. As usual, she's going through life pretty much alone (her mother doesn't care - in a choice between a $500 dollar vacuum and the $500 for her daughter's college enrollment fee, she chose the vacuum). As usual, I'm 5000 miles away and I can do no more than give moral support -_- I hate it.

That's ending when the summer ends, though. As soon as she gets out of her BestBuy job, I'm going to fly up there, grab her, and come back via train (she's scared to death of flying, so yeah). Then maybe her life will suck less. It will be an unbelievable boon for herto be around someone who actually cares about her ^^ and, yes, I plan on proposing to her in the not-too-distant future. I think a year and a half of a relationship plus knowing her for two years is enough for nobody to call me rash...

Well, I'll leave some updating for future posts ^^

DA

2005-06-12T09:26:32Z

I finally broke down and joined the ranks of the online art community whores! Check me out on Deviant Art - my screen name is SuddenUrge

Work

2005-06-05T14:58:39Z

Work...work...work...work....woooork...

demonic_b @ 2005-05-30T11:35:00

2005-05-30T15:38:23Z

Amanda's DeviantArt:
http://dark-reflections.deviantart.com

Things, currently

2005-05-17T15:31:40Z

I have less than two weeks left of my current classes, and I hear next month will be one of the toughest to get through, but I'm not too worried: Advanced Tools Programming and DirectX. Money is non-existant and will remain so until Friday, when George gets his check - my own will likely not be available for between two and three weeks. I have my credit card, though, and I've hardly charged more than $150 to it yet, so we will survive.

As for Amanda, her birthday is next Tuesday, the 24th. That means she'll be getting booted out of her mother's soon, though. She is going to move back in with her grandmother, but I'm worried that her mother won't allow her to leave with all of her belongings - especially not her $1000 computer. She and I decided to postpone her moving in until sometime between the end of the summer and the beginning of 2006. In the meantime, she's trying to get a job, an apartment, and her mind straightened out.

Honestly, I have some mind straightening to do for myself as well. I won't go into specifics on a public forum, though, so if anyone wants them, you can find me on AIM or MSN.

3DCC

2005-05-05T14:57:54Z

So, I started 3D Content Creation on Tuesday. It's completely badass. We're learning how to use Maya for the first half and, for the second half, we're making a mod for Unreal Tournament 2004 - so extremely badass! I think I'll make 3D representations of a my crazy-assed characters. I haven't been able to draw them, yet, so why not fully model and animate them?

demonic_b @ 2005-04-29T12:45:00

2005-04-29T16:45:37Z

I finally got in contact with her today. What happened on Monday wasn't as bad as I had imagined, but it worries me to no end when she says things like that...

I refuse to allow this to remain a secret.

2005-04-28T17:49:26Z

Had an interesting week already... Going like this.

Monday- Got the "Devil" beaten out of me.

Tuesday- Applied for damn job. Tried cleaning my wreck of a room, instead watched a screaming baby for a few hours.

Wednsday- Woke up at 6:15, by
6:30 things were going bad already(-_- don't ask). 7:50, got kicked out
of Sociology. ---------------------------> God knows what else this
week will bring.

This is a quote from my girlfriend's website about this week. I'm especially concerned about what happened on Monday, and I know that nobody on here besides akiyume knows about this, but she is in a situation of physical abuse. She told me not to tell anyone, but I just can't do that in good conscience. I just hope that my actions do not bring anything more upon her.

I want her out of there as soon as legally possible.

Things

2005-04-26T17:18:59Z

::ignores the fact that he disappeared for a month::

So, lots of things happened since I left for vacation way back at the end of March. Amanda decided she would move in with me here in Florida at the end of June - or whenever she gets her GED. The planning for the move is pretty much over with except for a few issues: she needs a qualified co-signer for her first Full Sail loan before she leaves, and she needs some sort of health insurance when she is here. The third is going to be finding a job for the summer. I really doubted it would be a problem before - what with this being a commercial hot spot and all - but my father has me worried about it now. Either way, though, I will be able to support us on my own loan, as I will be receiving the full $5000+ in one check right before she arrives. She can start paying (and repaying) after she finds work.

I'm trying to improve my artistic skills these days - which people may find surprising if they had taken me for a strict logical/mathematical guy. I am actually quite well-rounded, and I am currently dabbling in every skill that I think may be of use when I get out into the game industry, including: Japanese, character design (artistic and literary), writing (especially Campbellian), psychology/sociology, and other things that I can't think of right now. Most of my classmates are going strictly for programming - maybe with some additional understanding of math and physics if they feel they have to.

...but anyway, I need to go finish writing Pong for windows.

demonic_b @ 2005-04-01T10:23:00

2005-04-01T15:23:20Z

So, how's life going, world?

demonic_b @ 2005-03-30T01:30:00

2005-03-30T06:30:20Z

Best full body picture I've ever made with Photoshop - and it's even a self-portrait:

I had to cut the Anarchy symbol down to a normal triangle so that this addition wouldn't be too offensive to the community, but this is what my girlfriend added:

That one is also notable as one of the two pics made using only MS Paint!

The link to the full conga line image is here and the rest of the comments are here =3

demonic_b @ 2005-03-28T10:24:00

2005-03-28T15:24:10Z

You scored as Canada. You’re polite, friendly and pretty much an all around nice person. Everyone wants you at the party but at the same time no one really cares if you don’t show. You might consider hitting the gym once in a while.

</td>

Canada

80%

Great Britain

50%

France

45%

Kyrgyzstan

40%

United States

15%

What country are you?
created with QuizFarm.com

Check out which one is on the bottom. I live there.

Am I the only one who sees this as a problem?

demonic_b @ 2005-03-25T22:31:00

2005-03-26T03:32:04Z

Dear Allan,

Welcome to the International Game Developers Association...

...and in other news, I leave for MA in 7 hours ^_^

demonic_b @ 2005-03-17T19:02:00

2005-03-18T00:02:51Z

...and now the senate wants to fucking dig up a couple barrels of oil while sacrificing a NATIONAL WILDLIFE RESERVE. What...bullshit...

There's only enough oil in that reserve to fuel American traffic for 6 months, and we won't even get to it for TEN YEARS. We could simply pass legislation to set higher requirements for vehicular fuel efficiency but, "Noooo... we can't do that," because then Bush won't get payed off for allowing crooked oil companies to kill off all the endangered species.

In other, less bitchy news: I get a 9 day Spring Break starting on the 26th - during which I will be visiting MA again =D

How can we allow ourselves to be lead by the uneducated?!

2005-03-11T16:52:56Z

Life sucks. It sucks if you don't try very hard, because that comes around and bites you in the ass, and it sucks if you do try hard, because trying hard sucks ass. Then there's all of these damned rich boys up in Washington D.C. who never tried very hard at all because their damned rich daddies gave them everything they ever damned rich wanted. They're making life easier for other damned rich boys and harder for everyone else. What the fuck?

I really can't stand this place. This unfeeling, hateful society. This blatantly corrupt system of government. Is being screwed by a whole bunch of people really better than being screwed by one person? Where are all the fucking checks and balances? Where the fuck are the checks and balances?!

I suppose all the damned rich boys bought all those out... a long time ago.

pwnt

2005-03-02T21:50:49Z

As of yesterday, the first of March, my girlfriend and I have been living far away from each other for six months. I think the ones who said we couldn't last have officially been beaten.

On another note: Hey Neil, did you know that you are in the online encyclopedia, Wikipedia? XD

Stolen from stupidheadpenny

2005-02-28T03:40:41Z

You scored as Democrat. <'Imunimaginative's Deviantart Page'>

</td>

Democrat

100%

Anarchism

92%

Green

75%

Socialist

75%

Communism

67%

Republican

Nazi

Fascism

What Political Party Do Your Beliefs Put You In?
created with QuizFarm.com

Fairly accurate, although I really don't think my anarchism score should be that high. I seriously doubt any free society of totally unrestrained humans would last very long. For the record, I self-identify as a democratic socialist.

On another - potentially far more interesting - note, this pumice gel soap I got for Christmas left all sorts of little bits of pumice in my belly button.

Stolen from anonymous_me

2005-02-18T09:06:40Z

How common are demonic_b's interests

Universal

none

Popular

green day (83968)
psychology (75048)
radiohead (97856)

Common

ben folds (20077)
final fantasy (46807)
japan (49150)
japanese (21096)
monty python (47181)
programming (19955)
the white stripes (33397)
they might be giants (12070)

Specialist

agnosticism (5075)
amanda (2893)
flcl (9438)
serial experiments lain (4170)

Unusual

being strange (375)
kobayashi (15)
sam and max (374)
social democracy (213)
soul taker (102)

Rare

pwnage crew (1)
pwnt (8)

It would appear that agnostics are on the rise in LiveJournal land...sweet...but, wait a second...
...TWO THOUSAND EIGHT HUNDRED AND NINETY THREE PEOPLE ARE INTERESTED IN MY GIRLFRIEND?!?!
>=O

My universal opinion on marriage

2005-02-16T23:50:13Z

It's reported more and more that divorces are on the rise, and I have a theory. People seem to view marriage as a way to put their love for eachother in carbonite. They think that a rock, a ceremony, and a shared name is actually going to keep their relationship permanently intact. When people are married, they act like it's true. They take it all for granted. They stop maintaining their relationship with the false belief that the shiny thing on their spouse's finger will do that for them. Bullshit. That's exactly why any seemingly good relationship fails. Two people can be perfect for eachother in every way, but if one or both start to believe that the other's love is a given, it's already over. That's like winning the lottery, and believing that your money is infinite. Nothing lasts forever, but those few people who actually try can make it last until death or longer.

I see marriage as exactly that: something that makes people believe they'll be together forever, but the fact is that marriage is less permanent today than it has ever been. Not only that, but people jump into it much faster now, too - like it's just a big joke. Another good example is when a relationship is on the verge of collapse, so the two get married. They think that that will fix the problem. Bullshit! People should get married because their relationship is strong, not because they want to make their relationship become strong. I'm not saying that marriage is inherently a bad thing, but it has the potential to be. It should be treated as a symbol of the beautiful relationship underneath, as opposed to the relationship itself.

When people do, they shouldn't do it for any of those reasons. When they are, they should never take eachother's affection for granted. No object or ceremony is going to ensure that they will be together forever - that's their job.

demonic_b @ 2005-02-14T21:45:00

2005-02-15T02:45:57Z

Oh, the bliss of a distance relationship on Valentine's Day.

demonic_b @ 2005-01-30T02:19:00

2005-01-30T07:20:06Z

You know what my favorite kind of lead character for any game is? One that is weak, innocent, and unfortunate at the start, but rises up by the end (without becoming arrogant) as opposed to arrogant leads such as, for example, Tidus of FFX.

Tidus is a self-centered bitch. ::stares at the Tidus-shaped voodoo doll in his hand, filled with needles. laughs maniacally:: Die, Tidus, die! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAA!

::explodes in a glorious supernova a la Allan::

demonic_b @ 2005-01-27T04:41:00

2005-01-27T09:41:38Z

We must ask ourselves what is a genuine aspect of reality and what is merely an appearance or artifact of the particular perspective we call reality. For any situation in which several different outcomes are possible, perhaps all outcomes actually occur; this type of reality would consist of a steadily increasing number of parallel universes. It may well be that this is not a universe of actual events but a universe full of numerous unrealized tendencies where nothing ever actually happens but where everything remains within the realm of possibility. In this type of reality the electron's dynamic attributes depend on how that electron is measured. The electron's identity is a product of both the electron itself and its measuring device, in which case there is no true reality nor deep reality nor real identity for any electron, unless that electron is being measured, and the unmeasured electron is radically different from the reality of the measured one since measurement profoundly reshapes the reality itself. In this model of reality, everything that might have happened influences what actually does happen. To know an electron one must add up all its possible histories. The present may not be an objective feature of the universe but only an artifact of our subjective perspective on the universe. We take it for granted that events depend on earlier events in a way in which they do not depend on later events. There is then the possibility that certain present actions could be the causes of earlier events and there is no objective reason to believe the universe is divided into the past, the present, and the future. It seems equally inappropriate to say that there is no past for it no longer exists and that there is no future for it does not yet exist. It is important to draw a distinction between how things seem and how they actually are; it is dangerous indeed to assume seeming is the same as being. If the universe may be thought of as a certain definite quantity of forces and as a certain definite number of centers of force, then every representation of the universe remains indefinite. Let us imagine then that the universe must pass through a number of combinations in an infinite time so that every possible combination of such a universe would occur sooner or later. Each possible combination of the universe would occur an infinite number of times. The universe then is a finite but complex state going through a continual infinite and random rearrangement known as history. Recurrence is necessary for pretty much every physical system to which the second law applies, meaning the recurrence of time: not the recurrence of any single event but the recurrence of time as a whole. Time itself recurs eternally without any physical evidence. We will re-live, have already lived recurrently and infinitely, and will continue to live recurrently and infinitely as was believed by the pythagoreans. There is no other universe, only recurring states of this universe which exists both in the past and in the present and future though we ourselves do not exist continuously but sporadically, randomly, and eternally without consciousness and between memory though we crave eternal confirmation. If there is only the moment and the moment is the gate, then the gate too must exist in eternity and must have been here before, as the gate must return again, as we return. So that all moments resemble one another in the greatest things and in the smallest; so that all moments are but the vast arrangement of causes which lie entangled and which recur and which recreate the moment as a part of the causes of eternity. If time does not end then it cannot begin.

A challenge: tell me what you think of Godel's theories! Total bullshit? Right on? Somewhere in between?

Back to studying - right after this post.

2005-01-26T09:16:43Z

The next two days will be my Physics and Programming 2 finals. I'm not sure that even a 100% on the Physics final will allow me to pass the class. My Programming 2, on the other hand, I should be able to pass with any grade over a 70 - which will require minimal study to accomplish, but I'll be studying my ass off anyway.

Other things are going on, too. Rather than only visit in the summer as we had planned, Amanda wants to move in with me... and I'm all for it. Problem is, George (classmate, roommate, and cousin - for those who don't know) isn't so enthusiastic as I am about the idea. He's afraid that she's going to come down and freeload. Of course >I< know she would never do that, but he won't listen. Regardless, she >will< be coming in the summer, but we can't plan for her to stay long-term until he is convinced that he can trust her, which is reasonable I suppose. On top of that, she wants to make this all an act of defiance against her mother, who "wants her to stay forever and ever", but it wouldn't be right to do this behind her mother's back. I won't be made part of such a thing. I'd become "the asshole who stole my daughter"... not going to happen. She has to make a peaceful exit for it to work - and she'll be 18 by then, so her mother won't legally be able to stop her anyway.

Well, 12 hours and 40 minutes until my Physics final and about 120 days until Amanda "visits". Wish me luck.